The Grace Divide

When our children are young rules are pretty straight forward. Don't touch the stove. Don't jump on the couch. Don't stick that fork in the socket. They are largely designed around the physical protection of our children and for the most part, children don't question the rule even if they are willing to push the boundaries of it. It is a whole different story when they become teens. I remember when my children started asking me to validate my rules for them. I am going to be honest, at first, I was pretty irritated. "Why is this a rule?" "Because I said so, that's why!" Oh, I was indignant. How dare she question my rules. That rule is for her protection. I know why I made that rule. I made that rule because...umm...I made that rule because...Crap. I don't know why I made that rule. Oh, oh! I bet I made that rule because there is scriptural precedent for it. *Rushes off to look up scripture*. There is none. Great. I made a rule and I h...

"If you do not witness to every person you meet, then one day you will stand in heaven watching friends, family, and strangers walk past and ask you why you never told them as you look down and see their blood dripping from your hands." I can't tell you the number of nightmares I had related to hearing this said in multiple sermons from multiple pastors during my IFBC days. The day my children said the sinner's prayer was a day of great relief for me. I had it in the bag. I got them to say the Jesus prayer and now I would not have to watch them being marched to hell while their begging eyes cried out to me. Their blood would not be on my hands. Then they became teenagers. In a way, the questions that my teens started asking were good for both them and us. It has made them reckon with their faith in a way that I didn't think I was allowed to reckon until I was an adult. It also started me down the road of Reforming. What does the scripture actually say abo...

Here it is, my first brutally honest blog post about parenting teens. You're about to get a look into my head. I hope you're ready. I don't like it. There. I said it. I don't like parenting teens. Before you yell at me about the virtues and joys of motherhood let me clarify. I like being a mom. It's the mothering I don't like. If I could be their mom and just have fun without having to put in the work, I am there. But that isn't how this works, is it? From the moment my babes were born until the moment they are full-fledged adults and even to some degree after that, I will not only be called mom, but I will be called to BE a mother. I know this comes as shocking. I know it flies in the face of all the mushy toddler mom blog posts. I know it comes across as kind of stereotypical with the whole, "teens are so awful" feel. It really isn't that though. My teens aren't awful. I mean they can be as irritating, loud, and disrespectful as...

I search often, probably too often, for blogs that encourage Christian moms of teens. I can find a great number of awesome blogs for moms of little ones. I am so glad those resources are available for those of you just beginning your journey through motherhood. But, I never seem to be able to find a whole lot for those of us who are in the throes of the middle and high school years. My hope is that this blog will be a resource for my fellow moms of teens. I pray it encourages you and builds you up as you face the great trials and great joys of seeing your children into adulthood. With that, I am going to jump right into an introduction of sorts. I grew up Independent Fundamental Baptist (IFB or IFBC from here on out). I was born and raised in the same IFB church and I went to the school attached to the church my entire life. For the most part, I remember my childhood and teen years being pretty awesome. I had a stable home life, my parents adored each other, and my world, being s...